Monologues from Plays

‘You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown’ (Lucy): “I intend to be a queen”

“When I grow up I’m going to be the biggest queen there ever was…”

“Now, this is what you call a Failure Face, Linus.”

“It’s always a whole pack of wolves that bring the fawn down.”

“This is destiny pissing on your leg. What do you wanna do about it?”

“I could barely hear her over the tap dancing.”

“I think it’s safe to say my life would have turned out differently if I had played sports as a child.”

“Do you know what it’s like to have a twin?”

“This morning I was watching TV and Katie Couric was interviewing this fireman.”

“I don’t believe in God, per se… but prayer is still kinda cool”

“I wanted to kill Zackery, not myself ‘cause I__ I wanted to live!”

“I came to live with you because I loved you. I stayed with you because I loved you.”

If you knew me better, you’d see that this is exactly the kind of thing that’s likely to happen to me. Getting knocked up, I mean.

“Say mind if I use your phone? Figure I better check on the kids. No telling what devilment they’ve gotten up to.”

“First I was a tomboy. I used to climb trees and beat up my brother Tom.”

A comedic monologue from the play, ALMOST, MAINE, by John Cariani

“Hey! I’m looking around. I gotta get used to things. I’m not ready to sit. I’m too nervous to sit.”

“I don’t know if I really want to marry Walter.”

“That was the first girl I ever kissed. Rivkah was the first girl I ever got up in the morning thinking about”

“You keep saying that like it means something. You still don’t get it. The Quran is about tribal life in a seventh-century desert, Isaac.”

“Well obviously I can’t take this. I mean, I didn’t do it for the money anyway…”